Mall Rats
Astrith Ryan
I'm not sure where i am supposed to post the embarrassing dog pooping story, so hear goes. My mother in law is blind and has a seeing eye dog, at the time she had Baylor. Baylor was a german shepherd and a pretty big one at that... For being a big dog, Baylor was a pretty sensitive dog... Some of the weirdest things would set him off, either to bark at a stranger or take off or what have you. Well one day I took my mother in law and Baylor to the mall to pick up something... At the time we went there, it was roughly "high school let out time" so there were a lot of teenagers milling around the mall. When we walked through the door of the mall, many of the kids to make a scene would start to scream "Oh my god there is a dog" as if they had never seen one before. The more they screamed and yelled, the more Baylor got nervous. So as we walked away from the crowds of immature teens, I started to smell something foul, and as i looked down, Baylor was doing the poop-and-walk and poor sensitive Baylor had left a trail of poop from the food court all the way down to the center of the mall. I had to go back and pick up all this poop... not to mention in front of the yelling teens! To make matters worse, Mr. B (that is what we called him) had runny poop... so i had to ask vendors for paper towels to clean it up! Needless to say, we were careful from that point on as to what times we would go to the mall...


Open Patio Cafe
Beverly Sigler
My embarrassing dog pooping story is that everytime I take SHERMAN to an outside mall - he has to poop in front of the open patio cafe! It never fails... I will spend 30 minutes with him in the open field of grass... but as soon as we walk by the open patio cafe, he assumes the position. One time, a lady got up from the far side of the patio, ran over to the gate, and began yelling at me and telling me how rude I was, and to take my dog someplace else. All I could think to say was "shut up". I obviously think it's rude too, but when they have to poop, they have to poop.


Is this a Magic Trick?
Michelle Geraud VanAcker
Hands down my most embarrassing dog pooping story involves my late (but great) dog Remmy. Remmy was a German Shorthair with a love for eating things that us humans largely view as inedible. Once day I came home to find a chewed up tube from a paper towel roll on the floor--I thought nothing of it and assumed she got in the trash & proceeded to lether outside. I left her outside long enough to handle busines but when I opened to door to let her in she wouldn't come. She just stomped her feet, cried, and gave me the sad eyes. I thought she wanted me to come out side and play but when she turned sideways her little sausage tail wasn't long enough to cover her shame--she had a long peice of papertowel sticking out of her bum...it apparently wouldn't pass on its own. I had to help her out by pulling on this seemingly never-ending peice of paper towel. I gagged while she grunted and cried in shame. My neighbors were beyond amused. I died a little inside that day.


Tootsie Roll Factory
Erin Lynn O'Brien
I was having a party with a bunch of people and my mini dachshund ran down the deck stairs to go poop in the back yard in plain sight and my weimaraner ran right up behind her and "got the tootsie roll straight from the Tootsie roll factory. I yelled for him to leave her alone but he grabbed the piece of poo as is was let out by the mini doxie and started running from me. Then he stopped and ate it. Needless to say there were a lot of yucked out people!


Hey, I Found Your Panties!
Kitty Greentree
I work at a Doggie Daycare and one day I was with the dogs in our dog gymnasium watching the dogs play. We have a large Golden Retreiver who is famous for eating things. He squated low and poo'd on the floor and it had something in it...it was his owners thong undies. We gave them back to her in a plastic baggie that night when she came to pick him up

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Stuck in Traffic
Jimi Dunsmore
I was taking Norm for a walk around the block & when he decided it was go time. He chose the rush hour traffic slot at the busiest intersection in town. Normy "ass"umed the position & fired a ballistic missile which shot @ 3 ft. followed by a jetstream of the same distance. It must have startled my little buddy, or it propelled him in the other direction, not sure which. So with about 25 cars lined up at the stoplight at said busiest intersection, here I am armed with just my empty plastic grocery bag & a few paper towels to wipe the old boys o-ring, I had to do the customary snatch & grab with the grocery bag glove & with everyone & their brother watching my debacle. I go to bended knee to proffer my doggie hospice wipe with multiple horn honks & cat calls. Oh what you do because you love your animals...


jerryBear
Koryn DeYoung
When jerryBear was only 3 months old...he discovered the cat food bowl... we didnt think much of it as it was a one time finding. well later that evening some friends were bringing by a *baby* gate, and their son was rough housing and playing with jerryBear. he kept looking outside and trying to get away... after about 10 minutes he walked into our bedroom and through the entire apartment you heard *ppbppbpbpbbssplat* and the smell hit about 30 seconds later. needless to say... the friends left with their hands covering their noses and jerryBear now answers to the name Pooper!


Baseball Poo
Tom L'Ecuyer
Although all of the above mentioned stories are good, I have a 30 year old story that still stinks to this day. One summer afternoon I was about 9 years old, my friends and I decided to play a game of whiffle ball in one of their backyards. We played for several hours when my friends older brother came home with a couple of his friends. All was fine until I decided to play a prank with poop, black lab to be specific, I pitched a ball covered in the poop to my friends older brother where he proceeded to hit it, all over his friends, hair, face, it went every where. The next thing you know we all had a full fledged table spoon poop fight! Granted I started the fight and from that day on I have been nicknamed: Cuca I am 39 years old and people still call me this, people know me by this name, and not my real name!


Dog Agility & the Poop
Lori Coleman
Alright, here's mine. I did dog agility (doggie obstacle courses) with my Labrador Drucilla. We were competing in a trial, with our club members watching on from the side lines, the judge in the center of the ring. We were almost to the end, last jump and cross the finishline... Make that, last jump, in the "poop crouch" position, and poop on the field before crossing the finish line! Judge was amused, but we still were disqualified, spectators were in stitches, Drew felt MUCH better and did a victory lap before leaving the ring. *I* on the other hand was red faced and appalled!!


Doctor's Office Dog Poop Story
Harriet Caldwell
got to the doctors office and there was a piece of dog poop on the wheel of my oxy tank, my sis and i got tickled and when the nurse came in, she sniffed (but didn;t say a word) and we knew she smelt it and we laughted that much harder. So, I did the right thing and told her and we all 3 had a great laugh. Dragging dog poop to the doctors' office. Bad thing was, I had to walk thru the hospital to get to his office. Lord knows how many people smelt it as we went by. LOL!!!


Labradork at the Dog Beach
Kelli Rosell Fisher
While "trying" to leave the dog beach carrying my beach chair, towel, umbrella and beach bag, my 103lb mellow yellow Labradork (all muscle, no fat! I swear) decided to poop sea water right in front of a HUGE group of adults, kids, babies and dogs. If you've ever taken a water-loving Lab to the beach you already know they swallow A LOT of sea water unintentionally which means it acts like a colonoscopy prep. 2 gallons (or so it seemed) of brown water sprayed EVERYWHERE!!!! All over the back end of my dog doing the spray painting, all over my legs, all over my chair, my towel, my umbrella AND my beach bag. All over half of the group that were sitting in the sand RIGHT THERE. I was never so mortified AND grossed out in my entire life. People were screaming and running into the water to rinse off, I didn't even know where to begin to clean up the mess... all I could do was laugh while trying to dig up the brown sprayed sand into poop bags and leave as fast as I could.


Dog Poop Police
Sandy Minor
I was "babysitting" for a friend's LAB. I took her for a nice long walk and about a block away from my apartment, she dumped a big load. I had forgotten to bring a poop bag, so I figured I would just drop her off at home and bring a bag out to clean it up. Just as I was entering my building I heard a woman SCREAMING at the top of her lungs. I couldn't understand a word she said and having just moved here I wondered if ALL St Louisans were like that!! I grabbed a bag and before I could get out the door there was a loud banging on my door. I opened it to a very intimidating looking POLICE OFFICER telling me that I had to go pick it up!! I WONDERED IF THIS WOMAN SAT IN HER WINDOW 24/7 playing the poop patrol!!


The $100 Poop
Colleen Smith
Years ago, I gave my dog a rawhide. It quickly became a stub. She proceeded to swallow it. We figured it was no big deal. She'd pass it normally. It is a dog chew made by a dog chew manufacturer who would never create something harmful for a pet to put in its mouth. Three days later, Lil' Dikkins is pacing the room. She stops every eight to ten feet to stretch and arch her back, lying down onto her elbows with her front end, but leaving her back end sticking straight out into the air. This goes on so long that I have time to get the camcorder and video tape the acitivity for 10 more minutes. Needless to say, I made an EMERGENCY appointment with the vet explaining her weird behavior and never thinking twice what might have caused it. I got her leash on and headed out the door. As I opened the front door to go, she took a slimy white dump on the entryway tile. We still went to the vet where they took xrays and did an exam. What did they find? Nothing! ... anymore.

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My Golden Retriever & the Great Pantyhose Caper
Cari Oatley Miles 
One of our golden retrievers several years ago had a habit of eating our socks. One day he got ahold on a pair of my pantihose and ate one leg out of them. I didn't think anything about it until later that day he pooped out the leg and the end of it got stuck in his butt and scared him. He's running around the yard trying to get away from this thing in his butt and I'm chasing him so I can literally pull the rest of it out of his a$$. Nothing like pulling poopy pantihose out of your dog's butt. My husband laughed for days after that episode.


The Barehanded Banishment
Jeff DeMeo 
My wife was walking our dogs. The yard that has a sign that says " Please Clean up after your dogs" one of our dogs decides to poop!. Did I mention she has a stomach disorder and has the worst poops in the world!!!! She forgot her poop bags this day. There were many people around including the owner of the house. She did what she had to do and picked it up with her bare hands. I'm laughing as I write this. lol She carried the poop a few yards down and dumped it. When she got home she almost took a shower. Too funny.


Good Golly Miss Molly
Christina Pysher Holland-Radvon
We adopted our beloved bulldog, Lola, just 4 weeks ago. The night we brought her home, we stopped at Petco and picked up a plethora of puppy toys - including a new-fangled dog toy/ball made of strips of microfleece. She loved that ball! Rolled it around, played tug with it, even chewed on it and spit the pieces all over the living room. Last week, I noticed a good bit of the ball had been torn off in pieces and I took it away to avoid having her choke on the remnants. A few days later, I took her out for a walk around the neighborhood. She started whimpering and crying and dragging her rear end as we rounded the end of our driveway and passed the BBQ joint next door.. I thought for sure she must have gotten worms - until she turned around. :o Good golly, Miss Molly. All those microfleece pieces had merged into a giant turd-fleece-blanket. Still whimpering a crying and doing anything to get it out, she couldn't walk but two steps at a time. I had my son get some of her little pink, scented poo bags, and proceeded to pull the giant turd blanket out while she yelped and barked. Sadly...we were in full view of the BBQ restaurant's outdoor picnic table seating. I don't think those customers will be back anytime soon. ;)


Hey, is that a Balloon?
Melody Barnett Brosnan 
My husband bought me a little Min Pin for our first Christmas together. After a few months we went to visit the breeder so they could see how well she was doing. While my husband and I, the breeder and his wife were talking Sasha decides to poo right in the middle of the living room with all of us watching her. Before I could grab her I noticed something strange coming out of her and so did everyone else....it was the missing condom from the previous night.


Christmas Dinner
Jodi Zick
My parents' Cairne Terrier, Cricket, has always loved to snack on poo from the backyard. The first Christmas my now husband and I spent together started with breakfast at my parents' house. We sat down at the table and were just about to bless our meal when we heard a nice retching sound from next to my husband's chair. Cricket had thrown up on the carpet... and we couldn't tell if it was vomit or diarrhea!! Being one with a weak stomach, my husband's Christmas was ruined. Every time he tried to eat anything- breakfast, lunch, dinner- his mind immediately went back to Cricket's "Christmas Poo-Barf" and there was no way he was going to ingest anything after that!


Klondike Bar
Wendy Hixson
I took one of my fosters, Klondike (name change for the innocent) to the vets for a follow up to a previous condition, I had let him outside for 30 minutes before we left, let him mill in the front yard of the vets office (they keep it as a dog yard) and nothing happened. We waited for our appointment, he got loved on by the vet techs and other patrons at the vet's office, then were called into the exam room. So the tech has check him out, and is asking me the usual questions, what food does he eat, any problems etc. And as I am answering, we both wrinkle our noses and look at each other at the same moment. Klondike is laying out the largest pile I have ever seen, and the stench is so bad we had to evacuate the exam room. As Klondike and I exit the first exam room and go into a second, one of the receptionists (pregnant) walks by the door as I open it and nearly vomits on me. Needless to say I didn't bother asking about my rescue discount that day. haha


This is a Peeing Story
Terri Schlichenmeyer
This is a peeing story... does that count? We lived next to some neighbors who were kind of, well, not the brightest. They had a red lab that wasn't very bright either. One day, Mrs. Not Bright told me that they'd had their dog into the vet several times over the past month because she always smelled like pee. They had that poor dog checked for ... Read Moreeverything under the sun. She was telling me how really expensive it was and they couldn't find a thing wrong with the dog.
About 10 days later, I let my two small dogs outside in my fenced yard and I happened to see the lab run over to the fence and grovel... and my male terrier casually lifted his leg on her... and peed!!!


Spinning Class
Michelle Ludi Yonkers
When my dog Beemer ( a purbred Schnocker) :) was about 5 months old she got diarrhea when I was at work. I came home and found it on all the walls. Apparently when she felt the urge, she would spin while it came out!


Caught On Tape
Renea Dahms
I was doing an agility trial, and paid to have it video taped. Mr Indigo was cooking along nicely (or not so much -- but hey he was having a damn good time)...any way he decided NOW was the time to go so he stopped and pooped right there on the course -- so we are disqualified. I got my tape in the mail---- and as he is pooping the videographer says "OH NO HE'S POOPING" clear as a bell on my tape. As a matter of fact that is what she used as the "cover photo" on the VHS jacket! And it was so small the judge laughed it was not really getting himself excused for!
Haaaa to be humbled by your dog


Funeral Parlor Poop
Jamie Vojtech
Not quite as comical as some of the others, but the most lush/pooptastic lawn in the WHOLE WORLD seems to belong to the funeral parlor a few streets down from my house. It also has beautiful, big windows that she can peer into at the mourning while she's busy being "busy". Also, working at a boarding kennels, I am always amazed what people will feed their dogs before they come in, on purpose or otherwise. Today I cleaned up crayon-poo, we've have baby corn-poo, blue berry waffle-poo. I've also seen a dog poop out a matching set of white leather gloves, un-chewed.


Don't Pet Her!
Sydney Shackman
I had a Pet sitting/Dog walking business for 4 years. Anyway, I stopped at a one of my favorit doggie's house in a very expensive neighborhood in Palo Alto, California. It was in July and my clients were having a small block party in front of their homes, decked out with beautiful white tableclothed tables and everyone dressed in their summer best. I said "hello" to my doggie's parents and walked into their home and started down the street to the end of the block where Abby's(dog) and I have a favorite neighborhood garden we walk through. I took her leash off to let her run around. I knew she had a habbit of pooping and also of rolling in it, but never forsaw the hellish seen I was about to be thrust into. She decided she wanted to run back to her home where the scent of grilling steak and sounds of kids playing was too tempting for her...she just took off with fresh poop all over her. I chased her all the way back to the home, while yelling "don't pet her, don't touch her!!!" Too Late


Return to Sender
Ginny Pospisil
OK true story...not sure who it is more embarrassing for though...my family are responsible dog owners. We clean up after our pets, but some people carelessly let their dogs roam the neighborhood. The neighbor's dog came in our yard and did his business as my grandmother was sitting on the porch. After he finished doing the 'doo', grandma got a shovel, scooped it up, walked over to the neighbor's house and knocked on the door. When the man answered the door, grandma said, "I have something here that I that belongs to you." With that said, she dropped it on the 'Welcome' mat and strolled calmly back home!


Comments:

• Suzanne said:

  I don't know if this is just more gross or what, but...Many years ago my ex-husband and I had a dalmation. This dog had a horrible habit of eating his own feces. I would never let him near me if he did this. Well, one day, I wasn't feeling well and he had gone outdoors to do his "duty". Well, unbeknownst to me, he "brought it back in with him." I was in bed and when he jumped up on the bed he immediately vomited up his "ill-gotten" excrement and it landed on me!  I then followed suit! I didn't go to work for 3 days...I was more sick after that than I was before.

• Ann Gervais said:

  I was outside early one morning walking my 15 year old black lab/retreiver mix, when he decided to suddenly halt and take a whiz. Some kids on a big yellow school bus come by, and one kid yells out the window, "Hey! Your dog is peeing!" Just then, my dog decides to hunker down to get ready to poop, so I yell back at the kid, "Hey! Guess what he's gonna do now? He's POOPING!" The kid had a look of confusion on his face as I had shut him up.

• Javier Yesca said:

  I've had my dog Poopy for about 11 months now and I must say that I love her very much.....but.....she is the most timid dog ever. You can't take her anywhere without her spazzing out everytime somebody drives/walks by. I dread taking her out places for this reason. My girlfriend and I decided to go for a quick coffee at Starbucks, and hey, why not bring the dog? I mean, its not like Starbucks is a public place full of strange people or anything. I decided to have a seat outside, which, oddly enough, was even more crowded than inside. All of a sudden some girl yells out, "AWWW how Cuuuuute, a puppy!" So she runs over to my dog, who by the way was looking off in another direction at a passing car. The lady came right up to my dog and put her hand on my dogs back which made Poopy leap 18 feet. But, not before dropping a king size pile of chocolate surprise. upon landing she inadvertently stepped in her own poop, leaving little brown footprints all over the sidewalk. Armed with no bag, I was forced to do what anyman would have done. Napkins. Needless to say, 15 people got to enjoy watching me on hands and knees scraping poop from the concrete.

• Marlene said:

  I was asleep one sunday morning when my dog decide to stroll across my bed, over my face, and take a huge steaming dump right into my open mouth. It took awhile to register what I was trying to swallow, before the smell kicked in. I was so grossed out I brushed my teeth for 30 minutes straight. Later that I night, I leaned over to kiss my husband goodnight, to which he replied, "MMmmm, you taste delicious, what is that?" I didn't have the heart to tell him he was probably tasting dog fart, so I just went along with it and we made love like sea otters.

• Samantha Hammond said:

  I arrive at the dog-park with Teak (Catahoula mix), and she decides right away that it's time to do some poopin. Dog-park was fairly crowded with dogs and people this day. So Teak is in fine hunched poop-form and as the turd is about half way out, this huge Afghan dog decides comes running up with its very pointy face and begins to happily much away at the newly cooked and warm poop-snack that Teak is producing for him/her, STRAIGHT OUT OF HER BUTT!! All I could do was stand there with my jaw agape. Then when I finally look up and around for the owner of this dog with very strange eating habits, everyone else in the dog park looking over, also with jaws agape. Needless to say, the owner of said poop-eating dog is no where in site. I look back down, Teak is still pooping and the Afghan is still munching and not a turd was to reach the ground. I wasn't sure if I should tell the dog to stop, or to look away all of a sudden and pretend I never saw any of it. So I look away, and unsuccessfully try to hide a few reflexive gags. And no poop scooping!

• tracy said:

  I had to borrow my sister car & I had my 18 y/o pug Suki with me. Anyway, my sister is really highstrung & kinda....well. Anyway, Suki decided that she needed to go, but we were driving....she assumed & I had to catch it with my right hand (seriously, sis would have killed me & Suki)....so, I caught it & then hummed it out the window, sadly....it hit a car behind me & they totally flipped out. I had to do some crazy driving in order not to get our butss kicked. I never borrowed her car again.

• too embarrassed said:

  Well, I think we win. We have a bichon shitzu - lovable cute little nasty thing. He is the King of acrobatic pooping in strange places. I have 4 examples...
  1) He pooped on top of the 3" little leather ledge at the back of our sofa behind the cushions - with a wall behind it so no idea how he balanced!
  2) On a walk, he paused at a street light. I thought he was going to lift his leg to pee. He squatted instead and pooped right on the little 1" cement ledge around the base - 4" up off the ground!
  3) Hubby went to bed in the dark one night and he smelled poop. He turned on the light and there was a little pile right in the middle of his pillow! Cleaned everything up, threw the pillow in the wash and turned off the lights and settled in again. He still smelled it. Turned the lights on again and lo & behold there was ANOTHER pile in the middle of MY pillow, too!
  and drum roll ....the craziest thing of ALL.....
  4) I was getting ready for work this morning after breakfast. Noticed when I was all ready that he had been up on the table cleaning off my plate. Grr. Cleaned up and went to work. Hubby stopped home for lunch and the 6" tall super skinny glass I had forgotten on the table had 2 little logs of poo in it!!! How did he even get it in there!?! WHAT is WRONG with our freaking dog!!! At the very least we should get a medal for putting up with him!